Ungirdled Passion

Sitting Empty In A Soon-To-Be- Eggless Nest!

2011-08-26T12:18:00.003-04:00

As I write this, I am not only going through menopause, but my twin sons – my only children, my youngest and oldest – are leaving the nest. As you read this, they will have just moved into dorms at separate colleges. I am sitting eggless in what is about to be an empty nest. While I am both very excited and nervous for them — and for me — it doesn’t seem real. Doesn’t seem possible. Then I

The "F" Word: Why Fifty is so NOT the New Thirty

2011-07-29T08:45:00.005-04:00

If, like me, you are rapidly approaching the "f" word (fifty), are you as tired as I am of hearing "Fifty is the new thirty!"?! I talk about why I think it's SO NOT here. It's my monthly column for the good folks at Lifescript, and I think you'll really enjoy visiting the site. Lots of great info for us Ungirdled gals at any age! But especially those of us hovering around the "F" word!Thanks

Female Role Models: Snooki vs. Samantha Stevens

2011-06-23T16:35:00.010-04:00

I grew up wanting to be “bewitching” like Samantha, “lost in space” like Penny, and cleverly kick-butt like Agent 99. Those were my role models on TV, some of the females most revered in popular culture at the time. They were women and girls who used their wits (ok, and a little witchcraft) to save the day. Samantha was forever saving the bumbling Darren and his advertising accounts at McMann

Forget TMI; These Days There Can Be TMP

2011-05-27T07:59:00.007-04:00

My pulse quickens. My hands shake. My colon tightens. I begin to sweat profusely. I can’t believe it’s happening again. I’ve just received a message that a friend has “tagged” a photo of me on facebook. My mind races as my fingers fly across the keyboard. What event did I recently attend where someone had a camera? Or did my “friend” post a shot from back in the day that would be best

Royal Wedding, Schmoyal Wedding. Today We Honor The Ultimate Queen: Mom!

2011-04-29T07:34:00.010-04:00

"Lie down with a dog with fleas, and you'll get fleas!" "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all!" Where would you be without all mom's sage advice? Most likely, you'd be lying in a ditch "somewhere" with at least one eye poked out and without clean underwear on.So, today, the day of the royal wedding, I honor the first queen we all know in life: mom and all her funny,

Spring Fever - What Are Your Symptoms?

2011-03-24T18:05:00.008-04:00

This week we welcomed spring, and everyone I know is happy about it. Seems like this winter in particular was a messy, sloppy, irritating houseguest who long overstayed his welcome. As a result, many are catching spring fever, and I've realized we each present our own unique “symptoms” with this bug. Today I cover four I’ve recently observed. Do you have one of these

Bunco, Book Club - When It Comes To Health Benefits, You Can Say BINGO!

2011-02-25T08:19:00.007-05:00

How does having a regular "monthly" benefit your health and well-being? In more ways than you might ever imagine! If you've ever had guilt heading out the door for your monthly club meeting, read about the benefits here and banish that guilt for good! It's my monthly guest column at Health Bistro! Thanks for visiting! I would love to hear how your "monthly" benefits you in the comments

How Do Raw Sewage, Crazy-Daisy Spewed Vomit and Rotten Pumpkin Add Up To The Ideal Valentine?

2011-01-27T19:43:00.010-05:00

Find out here! It's my monthly guest column for the good folks at Lifescript and Health Bistro. I'd love for my Ungirdled sisters (and brothers!) to leave a comment on your ideal Valentine at the end of the post there. Need a spiffy card or festive Valentine's banner? You can find them here! The photo at right shows one available. Need a gift for your special Valentine? How about a

What Are Your Resolutions for 2011?

2010-12-31T09:51:00.002-05:00

Happy new year to the Ungirdled nation! I so appreciate you coming to visit throughout 2011! Your friendship has meant a lot. As we enter a new year, I've made a few resolutions and am wondering what yours are. Please share them here. It's my monthly guest column for the good folks at Health Bistro and lifescript.com. Best wishes for a new year filled with lots of love, laughter, great

Teenagers and The Family Christmas Card

2010-12-20T20:53:00.006-05:00

Every year, I ask my family to pose for what I think is a fun family Christmas card. I have shared a few here with you before. When my boys were little, they really got into it. As evidenced here:At age two, my little angels were only too happy to pose and wish everyone "peace, love and joy." At age three, they happily posed with their dad as the "three wiseguys, offering gifts of gold,

Win An iPad at Lifescript!

2010-12-16T17:29:00.003-05:00

The good folks at Lifescript.com and Healthbistro are offering the chance to WIN AN iPad!!! But HURRY! It ends at noon on Dec. 17. Click here for details!! Good luck and happy holidays!

Personalized Dog & Cat Prints - Great Gift! Lots of Breeds Available!

2010-11-28T15:34:00.025-05:00

As mentioned in an earlier post, I recently began selling handcrafted jewelry and home decor products at my own shop at etsy.com. If you're unfamiliar with etsy, it's a really FABO international, online craft and vintage site featuring handcrafted goods from shopkeepers all over the world! I had long been an etsy customer. I love the idea of buying unique, handcrafted gifts, jewelry, handbags

Do Men Have The Right Idea About Thanksgiving?

2010-11-26T10:10:00.005-05:00

After another annual four day grocery shopping-cleaning-cookathon, I'm starting to think the menfolk have the right idea in their approach to Thanksgiving and the holidays in general. What do you think? Weigh in here - it's my monthly guest column at healthbistro.com, a site with lots of great information and humor for us Ungirdled gals. I'd love to know how it goes at your house.Men really

Halloween - Not Just for Kids & Skanks! Costume Ideas For Busy Moms!

2010-10-29T16:34:00.005-04:00

If you’re a busy mom of teens like me, your days are jam-packed with bribing teachers, posting bail, and trying to figure out why Tupperware containers emptied of leftovers are placed back in the fridge while half-full milk and juice cartons are left on the counter over night. You’ve got little time to come up with a costume for your kids, much less yourself. But Halloween shouldn’t be just for

Bling For Your Private Thing?

2010-09-24T08:28:00.004-04:00

We women like to dress things up. We slip our iPods into decorator covers, we put bows on our mailboxes at Christmas time, and we even buy rubber gloves adorned with jewels and ruffles to cheer us while performing household chores. What isn’t better with a little window dressing? Well thanks to a recent book club discussion, I can now think of one thing. It was brought to my attention that

Are You Your Own Weather Channel?

2010-08-27T08:37:00.007-04:00

Living on the Virginia coast, I keep close tabs on the weather this time of year for the possibility of a hurricane. I fixate on Jim Cantore the way other women obsess over George Clooney. Watching the Weather Channel makes me think that for those living with a middle-aged woman, it must be like watching that station 24/7.For example, I've noticed a tropical depression will

When Your Uterus Has Fallen And It Can't Get Up

2010-07-30T10:01:00.003-04:00

Just when you thought age had thrown the middle-aged woman enough symptoms comes a "special" problem I only recently learned of but understand is quite common and most unsettling. Take a deep breath and put on your big girl Ungirdled panties (you'll see you need them) before clicking here to found out for yourself. It's my monthly guest column for the good folks at Lifescript.com and Health

Has Age Affected Your Very Sole?

2010-06-25T08:38:00.006-04:00

I don't know about you, but age has affected my very sole. Used to be, no matter how old or heavy I was feeling, I could put on a pair of shoes and transform myself into a ballerina, cowgirl, gladiator, athlete - anything or anybody I wanted. Now, age has changed all that. To read more, just click here - it's my monthly guest column for the good folks at Lifescript.com and Health Bistro. Feel

Fallen Soldiers In The Battle of The Bulge

2010-05-28T08:13:00.008-04:00

Many have fallen in my personal battle of the bulge. This Memorial Day weekend, I pay homage to them here where I am guest blogging at Lifescript.com, a great website with tons of useful information and fascinating facts for the Ungirdled. Feel free to leave a comment about your own battles and victories in the war on weight at the end of the post.Best wishes for a terrific Memorial Day with

Two Dildos and A Screen Door: Men and Gift-Giving

2010-05-14T09:41:00.011-04:00

Part seven in a little series we like to call "Men's Genes Are Not Cut For Women: Understanding and Coping With Those Possessing The WHY? Chromosome." With Mother’s Day occurring in the recent past, we’re reminded how much our much-loved men often stink at the present – selecting one for us, that is. Men may be natural hunters of beast and prey, but when it comes to hunting gifts, you best pray

Diet Advice From Skinny Friends Wearing Thin?

2010-04-30T07:22:00.009-04:00

Then you'll love this guest post at Health Bistro! Just click here for the skinny on what chubbies know! Please "weigh in" by adding a comment at the bottom of the post. Thanks for visiting! You'll love Health Bistro and Lifescript.com TONS of great info. for us Ungirdled women!There are two more places you might like to visit. Remember my friend Sheila Kilpatrick who guest blogged here a

Teenage Enigmas

2010-04-13T09:15:00.014-04:00

If you’ve ever encountered a teenager, either in the wild or its natural habitat, you know the species are walking-sassing contradictions. I have the torment pleasure of observing two in the habitat I share with them. Some observations from the field: • The same subjects which spend hours grooming their hair to get it just right will play it fast and loose with the rest of their bodies while

My Ovaries Are Having An Out-Of-Business Sale & All My Clothing Is Half Off!

2010-03-26T09:26:00.003-04:00

Hot flashes and other signs of perimenopause getting to you? Cry, laugh, commiserate, and rant here where I am guest blogging for the good folks at Lifescript! It's a great blog with all kinds of useful information for us Ungirdled women! Please leave a comment with your perimenopausal rants or remedies! Have a great, hot flash-free weekend hot stuff! Thanks for your

Do You Look Like You Feel?

2010-03-08T08:08:00.001-05:00

Do you look like you feel? I go around feeling like this: Of course I don’t think I look like that! I know I don’t. Not anywhere close. Not in the same ballpark, neighborhood of even hemisphere of it, it’s just that If I had to visualize how I feel, this is how I visualize me. Then, I will unfortunately, see a photo of myself someone’s recently taken, and immediately I feel like I look

Oprah Makes Me Feel Bad, But This Time I Think It’s Worth It

2010-03-02T16:33:00.014-05:00

When it comes to guilt trips, I have logged more mileage points with Oprah than I have with US Air, American Airlines and my mother COMBINED. Oprah makes me feel bad for so many reasons. Thanks to her constant crusades, I feel I should be eating a "kinder" diet, reading better books, doing more for charity and saving better (that Suzy Orman can really give you a good scolding). I’ve realized I

Are You A Granny Panty, Spanx Or Special Occasion Lingerie Friend?

2010-02-26T08:09:00.007-05:00

Are you more of an athletic bra or special occasion lingerie friend? What type of friends do you most in your underwear drawer - granny panties, Spanx or thong friends? What in the world am I talking about? Find out here where I am guest-blogging for the wonderful folks at Health Bistro! Feel free to weigh in with your comments! Thanks for visiting and have a terrific weekend!

Girl Scout Cookie Sales Alternatives For The Ungirdled Nation

2010-02-16T10:06:00.011-05:00

It’s that time of year again. Just when we realize our new year’s resolutions to lose weight aren’t going to pan out, cherub-faced do-gooders known as Girl Scouts begin ringing our door bells to hawk their irresistible cookies. Just what my fudge-filled thighs need, a coating of Thin Mints. (The name is even enticing – THIN mint, when it’s anything but.) Who can resist them or the delectable

Winter Blahs? Try These Mood Boosters

2010-02-08T12:11:00.012-05:00

If you’re like me, you may have noticed a lot of people in a bit of a funk and may have even found yourself feeling a little funky. Whether it’s the economy or just a case of winter blahs, many of us could use a way to lift our spirits. I recently saw a spot on TV highlighting ways to boost your mood based on a New York magazine feature titled "50 Steps To Simple Happiness." These were things

Guest Blogger Sheila Kilpatrick Talks About The “P” Word

2010-01-31T21:27:00.010-05:00

Today, guest blogger Sheila Kilpatrick talks about the “P” word: patience. As Ungirdled (and often estrogen-deprived!) women, patience is something we often find in short supply. Sheila knows of what she speaks. She has paired patience with perseverance to triumph over cancer and become an award-winning children’s book author. In addition to being a terrific writer, Sheila is a wonderful

Check Out Great Website For The Ungirdled!

2010-01-29T10:13:00.006-05:00

I was asked to do a monthly guest column at Health Bistro. You really need to check it out – not for my sake, but because is has a lot of really great stuff on there for us Ungirdled women. Things like “5 Worst Things For Your Gut,” “Anti-Aging Recipes” “Low Libido? It Could Be Diabetes,” and lots more. Of course, if you want to add a comment at the bottom of my column

A Call To Arms – Actually Legs & Va-jay-jays – For The Younger Generation

2010-01-26T09:28:00.014-05:00

Ungirdled sisters, take note: the younger generation desperately needs our help when it comes to dressing for success. I am no fashion maven, and the last thing I want to do is come off snooty and judgmental, but I have noticed too many young ladies stumbling in stilettos and micro-minis at school and other events that call for “business” or “professional” attire When attending school events

Christmas Card For The Recession

2009-12-19T14:57:00.010-05:00

Here's a Christmas card I wanted to make and send for these tough economic times, but my husband said no:Neal Conan of NPR's "Talk of the Nation" read it on his show this week when I submitted it for a segment on "Holiday Cards For The Recession." I thought I'd share it with you, as I suspect the Ungirdled have more sophisticated tastes than my better half and would appreciate it too!Best wishes

Homemade Funny Family Christmas Cards

2009-12-10T10:00:00.007-05:00

Every year we like to do something silly for our family Christmas card. Thought I'd share a few ghosts of Christmas cards past. The one above was featured in our local paper.The one above was featured on "Live With Regis & Kelly" and in our local paper!More to come! In the meantime, happy holidays and best wishes for a new year filled with love, laughter, good health and happiness no matter

Ungirdled Finds For Fall (And An Overdue Apology!)

2009-10-26T16:11:00.012-04:00

(I know. I know. It’s been a loooong time. A real long time since I’ve posted, and I apologize. Truth is, I’ve been busy working on a shop on etsy.com (if you haven’t visited, you really should – sooo much cool stuff by thousands of great artists and crafters. I’ll post more on my humble little etsy shop once I get it all set up. The reason I began work on an etsy shop is because, while I

Yoga - Let The Spirit Move You

2009-09-16T09:44:00.023-04:00

Seems many are enjoying the benefits of yoga. I, too, have tried this meditative, beneficial and ancient discipline from India. I have found many of the poses tough to accomplish or hold, however. Come to find out, there's a real secret to mastering these exercises. The technique is as old as yoga itself. Simply, you must let the spirit move you. The spirit can be gin, vodka, or rum. It

The S Word Has Hit The Fan

2009-09-09T10:21:00.013-04:00

I know, I know. I’ve been slackin’ on blog posts. Most of it is due to the S word hitting the fan. Yes, school has started. Life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness has ended. I’m trying to accept it with good spirits (the best gin, vodka and rum money can buy) and keep a brave face, although not an attractive one when you must rise in the dark and rattle the monkey cages of Things One & Two

My Husband: Living Up To The TV Stereotype OR Can I Get A "Happy Birthday" In Da House?

2009-08-31T08:40:00.005-04:00

I have a terrific husband. I really do. He’s a wonderful father, supportive friend, great provider and so much more. When it comes to birthdays and holidays, though, he lives up to the sitcom stereotype. Think Ricky Ricardo, Tim Taylor or Fred Flintstone. Saturday was my birthday, and he forgot it. This wouldn’t seem so bad, except HIS IS JUST THREE DAYS BEFORE MINE. Oddly, it ALWAYS works

Letters To Manufacturers & The Deciders Of Things

2009-08-24T07:45:00.010-04:00

One huge, affluent segment wields more spending clout than any other: Ungirdled (aka Baby-Boomer) women.* We are the most consumingest consumers. We’ve also been around the block. Because of this and the fact that we are running low on estrogen, this makes the people who should and WILL tell manufacturers and the powers that be HOW things should be. Following are a few of my questions and

Negative Body Image Genes: Dominant In Women, Recessive In Men

2009-08-17T13:35:00.014-04:00

Part seven in a little series we like to call "Men's Genes Are Not Cut For Women. Understanding and Coping With Those Possessing The WHY? Chromosome." On the road to becoming fully Ungirdled, we women will worry ourselves crazy over how we feel our bodies look, focusing on what we perceive to be every imperfection. As we get older, the imperfections seem to multiply. Shift happens. Everything

August 15: National Relaxation AND National Failures Day!

2009-08-14T00:55:00.017-04:00

Saturday is National Relaxation AND National Failures Day. Coincidence? Let’s nonsensically ponder it. Some would say if you relax too much, you’ll fail at life. As a society, our nation seems more driven than most. We enjoy far less vacation time than most European countries. Our average annual paid vacation time is 8.9 days, whereas most European countries’ is 20-25 days. Have we failed to

Beach Etiquette - Missus Manners Guest Blogs!

2009-08-10T17:28:00.020-04:00

Today, Missus Manners guest blogs with some tips on beach etiquette, which I find quite a coincidence, as yours truly lives at the beach and has been frequenting the shore as of late! Feel free to print these out for beach goers you encounter who are in need of such tips. Thanks for guest-blogging, Missus Manners! Gentle Neanderthals Readers who happen to smoke, please know that most folks who

New Breastfeeding Doll Keeps Things Tit For Tat With Bottle-fed Dolls

2009-08-06T10:01:00.011-04:00

Some days, it’s hard to come up with a blogging topic. Other days, simply keeping abreast of the news pays off. That is the case today. Spanish toy manufacturer, Berjuan, has just released "Bebe Gloton," reportedly the first-ever breast-feeding doll for children. No joke. In keeping tit for tat, Bebe Gloton (which, when translated, means Baby Glutton) is meant to act

How To Cope With Men's Selective Memories

2009-08-03T12:06:00.004-04:00

We all know and joke about men’s “selective hearing genes.” They’ll hear only what they want to. Not long ago, we discussed men’s “selective vision genes.” Today, we take a look at men’s “selective memory genes.” Have you ever noticed that while your husband has to pause to remember the date of your wedding anniversary, he need not hesitate when rattling off minute details of the career stats

Hey, Wasn't That Us?

2009-07-29T15:52:00.017-04:00

I received the following email today. It took me for a nice little trip down memory lane and thought it would take you there, too. An Ode To The Ungirdled Woman's Childhood:A little house with three bedrooms and one car on the street . A mower that you had to push to make the grass look neat. In the kitchen on the wall we only had one phone, And no need for recording things, someone was

Russian Woman Snatches Record For World’s Strongest Va-Jay-Jay

2009-07-27T09:46:00.006-04:00

(A warning: the following post contains information of a, let’s say, delicate nature, but I thought, like me, you would find it pretty unbeaverable.) Just when I thought I couldn’t feel any more inadequate in the area of fitness, I find there’s one area I have totally ignored in my workouts: my vagina. One Russian woman, Tatiata Kozhevnikova, however, thinks out of the box (or I guess OF the

Number 1 Reason We REALLY Need More Female Architects: Going Number 1!

2009-07-24T09:57:00.010-04:00

Last night, I was out with girlfriends at a wine tasting and was once again reminded of another way men and women are much different. We have the need to empty our bladders much more frequently. We know that when it comes to the “number 1” reason for visiting the powder room, it takes ladies a little longer than it does the gentlemen. (When it comes to the “number 2” reason, men have us beat by

Feminine Hygiene Products = Male Kryptonite

2009-07-22T08:54:00.010-04:00

When men take a trip, they often like to have an element of danger involved. Some intense white-water rafting, bungee-jumping, parasailing – that’s the ticket. There is one trip, however, they consider absolutely too terrifying: the trip down the feminine hygiene products aisle. Men will kill spiders for us. They’ll plunger commodes for us. They’ll even go to war for us, but do not, I repeat

Symptoms of Menopause, Perimenopause, & Jabba The Hutt Syndrome

2009-07-19T06:50:00.003-04:00

We can blame it all on that greedy damn Eve. She just had to have that apple (or was it quince?) Anyhoo... it wasn’t like she found an éclair tree in the Garden of Eden or a diamond tree or a martini tree she just couldn’t resist. It was an APPLE tree. Thanks to her, we have menstrual cycles and periods, and what we Ungirdled Women have come to learn is even worse than periods: the shutting

The Tupperware Party Gene: Dominant in Women, Just Plain Missing In Men

2009-07-17T06:40:00.002-04:00

Part five in a little series we like to call "Men's Genes Are Not Cut For Women. Understanding and Coping With Those Possessing The WHY? Chromosome." I think we can all agree men and women are very different. Today’s case in point: the Tupperware Party gene. While men get math genes, women posses the Tupperware Party Gene. In an effort to obtain a “free” plastic food storage container,

I've Fought The Lard, And The Lard's Won

2009-07-15T07:00:00.010-04:00

Third in an Ungirdled Series, “If Age Is A Gift, May I Please Exchange It?”My metabolism was telling me (actually shouting at me) to step up the ol' workout routine. I consulted my trusted exercise authority, the workout aisle at Target, for a new regime. The kettlebell was considered, but thinking of a kettle while exercising would just have me thinking about cooking and eating from one. Had

Soil Sisters

2009-07-13T10:22:00.011-04:00

I am not sure why it is that Ungirdled women come to appreciate the beauty and pleasure that gardening brings. While we love our children, I suspect we all enjoy raising something that doesn’t sass or leave dirty dishes lying about. We’ve also reached the age where we value a man who can perform well in our flowerbeds. Some are so into their gardens they find themselves suffering peony envy!

Female Foundations - Choose Your Underwear As You Would Your Friends

2009-07-10T09:05:00.013-04:00

It’s that time again. Time to go get new underwear. Most of mine is creeping into places it shouldn’t either out of shame and horror or because of such great strain to the elastic, it’s slap-wore-out. Whatever the reason, I gotta do it. I dread it, because while I know exactly what I’ll get: Hanes Her Way 100% cotton hi-cut briefs (granny panties) in basic white, black and nude, I know I’ll

Jesus Loves Me. The DMV? Not So Much.

2009-07-08T07:02:00.004-04:00

Just one in a series of Ungirdled rants.I’ll admit it. I was not expecting a smooth, short or carefree experience going in. But, I was determined for Thing One to get his learner’s permit. Thing Two had gotten his a few months earlier with his dad. Thing One was not too interested in driving as he was happy having a chauffeur on retainer. (I obviously work for an continuouis stream of

Today Is National Fried Chicken Day!

2009-07-06T08:26:00.020-04:00

Today we celebrate fried chicken – a most wonderful and Ungirdled entrée. In honor of this day, I am going to give you my aunt’s favorite method for preparing fried chicken for company (this recipe has never failed her): Ingredients: • Enough flour to dust your kitchen counter plus a little for your apron • Pan of oil on stovetop • Warm oven • Couple of buckets of your favorite

The Fourth Of July - The Manliest of Holidays!

2009-07-03T10:52:00.010-04:00

The Fourth of July is upon us, and while we Ungirdled women love to celebrate it, the truth is, the Fourth is a man’s holiday. It features four things men love: beer, meat, fire, and pyrotechnics. The USA is a ballsy nation, with ballsy beginnings. We fought hard for our independence and we continue to fight hard to protect it. What better way to celebrate than to take the two biggest farm

Family Vacation: A Chance For Parents To Be Dissed In Exotic, New Locales!

2009-07-01T09:39:00.010-04:00

We recently splurged on a family trip to Costa Rica over spring break. We wanted to make some special family memories and show our boys the beautiful country my husband and I had visited when first married 20 years ago. Also, we craved the opportunity to be berated and dissed in a foreign land by 16-year-olds who somehow know way more in their 16 years than my husband and I could possibly

Cheating Politicians: A Couple Of Questions

2009-06-29T09:08:00.017-04:00

The list of animals that mate for life (to name a few of many) includes: gibbon apes, wolves, termites, coyotes, barn owls, beavers, bald eagles, condors, swans, cranes, pigeons, red-tailed hawks, angelfish, ospreys, geese, whales, penguins and black vultures.Notice that male politicians are not on this list. As you have surely heard by now, yet another politician has been found to be cheating

Losing Farrah & Michael

2009-06-26T10:14:00.021-04:00

I like Ungirdled Passion to be a place for you to come for a grin or a giggle, but today of course, is a sad day with the passing of both Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson. Losing both in one day is still hard to believe. Part of being Ungirdled is letting yourself be sad when you need to be sad. Today, I am sad, and I suspect you may be sad too. I remember my sister and I, as teenagers,

How Not to Act Old: A New Book Is Coming To Save Us!

2009-06-24T06:00:00.017-04:00

How nice for us Ungirdled women of “a certain age!” Author Pamela Redmond Satran has written a guide for “How Not To Act Old: 185 Ways To Pass For Phat, Sick, Hot, Dope, Awesome, Or At Least Not Totally Lame.” (I declare, I think I grew old reading that title!) While the book will not be released until August, MORE magazine readers get a sneak peek via selected excerpts this month. MORE’s

Attending Social Functions: Men And Women Prepare A Little Differently

2009-06-22T10:34:00.015-04:00

Third in an Ungirdled series: "Men's Genes Are Not Cut For Women. Understanding and Coping With Those Possessing The WHY? Chromosome."Not long ago we observed the differences in men vs. women when it comes to hosting a party. This weekend, we had a number of social functions to attend, and I was painfully reminded that when it comes to attending a party, men and women have very different

Father's Day Salute!

2009-06-19T17:45:00.028-04:00

Since Sunday is Father's Day a salute to all the wonderful dads! First some favorite quotes on fatherhood followed by some cuts from an email I recently received recalling Olan Mills - remember them? If you're an Ungirdled woman, chances are you had a couple family or individual portraits made there."Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope." - Bill Cosby "When I

When It Comes To The Effects Of Aging, It's Best To Keep Your Chin Up

2009-06-18T06:55:00.010-04:00

Second in an Ungirdled Series, “If Age Is A Gift, May I Please Exchange It?” I really do feel bad about my neck. About the time I started developing my wattle, Nora Ephron came out with the best-selling book, “I Feel Bad About My Neck.” I really enjoyed reading it (it’s a fun book) but also felt a little sorry for Nora and her neck problem. I did not yet know I should be saving my pity for my

Chinese Chicken Salad - This Week's Ungirdled Recipe!

2009-06-17T05:55:00.010-04:00

This is not the most Ungirdled recipe, as it involves a number of steps, but it’s easy and a real winner. My friend introduced it to me a few years ago when she brought it to a party I was hosting and just about stole my thunder with it. I forgave her, as she turned me onto one of my all-time favorite recipes. It’ll make YOU a star at your next summer picnic or luncheon. It’s from Ina Garten

Dolly Parton: This Week's Ungirdled Celebrity!

2009-06-16T05:55:00.013-04:00

There are not many people who can say they’ve been nominated for the Grammy, the Oscar, the Emmy AND the Tony awards, but Dolly Parton can! (Didn’t you love her in 9 to 5 and Steel Magnolias?) She is the most successful woman in country music, with a record 25 number one singles, and a record 42 top 10 country albums. She is the only artist to have scored a number one country single in each of

"Real" Housewives Of New Jersey: There's Been Some De-Flowering In The Garden State!

2009-06-15T06:30:00.011-04:00

Forgive me, Ungirdled Sisters and Brothers, for I have sinned. I have met the devil. It is Bravo TV. And I have fallen prey to the devil’s temptations over and over again. I am so ashamed to have to confess that I have watched all the episodes of “The Real Housewives of New Jersey.”For the uninitiated, these “housewives” are about as real-life as the “bubbies” (their word for boobies) they

Entertaining & The Sexes: Men Have A Slightly Different Approach

2009-06-12T06:18:00.018-04:00

Second in an Ungirdled series: "Men's Genes Are Not Cut For Women. Understanding and Coping With Those Possessing The WHY? Chromosome." A number of my friends are busily preparing for big parties to celebrate their children’s graduations. Seeing the women I know rush around to prepare weeks in advance reminds me of another way men and women vary genetically. Most Ungridled women have learned

72 Year Old Great Grandmother Tasered In Texas

2009-06-11T17:55:00.012-04:00

Don’t mess with Texas. Especially a Texas cop, ‘cause they’ll taser your great-grandmother’s behind in a heartbeat (that is, if granny’s ticker can survive the blast). That’s what Kathryn Winkfein found out the hard way recently when she refused to sign a speeding ticket. (Which, come to find out, is not illegal in Texas.) You’ve no doubt seen the footage of the 72 year-old getting tasered by

Blueberry Crisp - The Week's Ungirdled Recipe!

2009-06-10T05:50:00.007-04:00

It’s blueberry season (or almost, depending on where you live) so this week, a super-yummy, totally Ungirdled recipe using this nutritional powerhouse (read about all the nutritional benefits below). Because I am all about keeping the Ungirdled sisterhood healthy and happy, here is a recipe from my friend and neighbor you’ll be making again and again because it is THAT EASY and THAT GOOD! It’s

Katharine Hepburn: This Week's Ungirdled Celebrity!

2009-06-09T09:34:00.000-04:00

I don’t have to tell you who Katharine Hepburn is. As an Ungirdled woman, you probably love her too. She is the ultimate Ungirdled woman. She holds the record for most “Best Actress” Oscars with four wins out of 12 nominations. She is also the winner of an Emmy, two Tonys, and eight Golden Globes! I think my all time favorite Hepburn picture is a tie between The Philadelphia Story and Guess

Men: More Than Just Color Blind

2009-06-08T06:21:00.016-04:00

Have you ever noticed that most men are blind when it comes to locating household items. They will often be inches away from the “lost” object, yelling for you to come find it as if a woman’s ovaries give her special powers to see through drawers, doors, and beneath furniture for their keys, wallets, etc.. Your man will have his face stuck in the refrigerator yelling, "

Sole Searching: Why Do We Women Love Shoes?

2009-06-05T05:50:00.009-04:00

Why is it we women love shoes so much? We all seem to adhere to the “no shoe left behind” act when shopping for footwear. We want to take them all home and nurture every little sole. I am not sure of all the reasons we are so mad about them, but I have a couple of ideas. Shoe design is an art form – each style is like a sculpture. Shoes can be shiny or textured, with slim or chunky heels,

Newsweek Blasts Oprah! What’s Next? There’s No Santa?!

2009-06-04T05:55:00.015-04:00

My hands trembled as I read the cover of this week’s Newsweek I pulled from the mailbox (see right). There was a photo of an almost crazed and emotional Oprah with the title, “CRAZY TALK – OPRAH, WACKY CURES & YOU.” They were calling Oprah, THE Oprah, crazy? Her advice “wacky?” This was utter blasphemy. Oprah is like God. Think about it. They're both worshiped by practically everybody,

Fresh Tomato Bow Tie Pasta - Ungirdled Recipe Of The Week!

2009-06-03T05:55:00.007-04:00

This recipe is an easy, quick throw-it-together thing (meaning SUPER UNGIRDLED) you can tinker with to your liking. We make it all the time and everyone always wants the recipe, even though there really isn’t one, but here is how it’s thrown together: • 1 lb. box of bow tie pasta • 10 teaspoons (or 3.5 TBS) of chicken bouillon • 1 pint or more of grape tomatoes or an

Lily Tomlin - Ungirdled Celebrity Of The Week!

2009-06-02T05:55:00.008-04:00

Ungirlded Women have fond memories of watching Lily’s characters Ernestine, Edith Ann and others on the sketch comedy show Laugh-In. Since then, Lily has delighted us in many film roles, including those in 9 to 5, Nashville, All of Me, I Heart Huckabees and many others. She has appeared in numerous TV specials and series including roles in Murphy Brown, The West Wing and

Shopping Etiquette For The Un-Ungirdled

2009-06-01T05:55:00.006-04:00

There are more peri-menopausal and menopausal women in the U.S. right now than ever before – over 40 million of us. What does this mean for the rest of you? Well, chances are, that while running errands, you’re likely to encounter a woman whose patience has been stretched dangerously thin by an overabundance of insults from teenagers, rapidly-plunging estrogen levels, and hot flash-induced

Have A Happy Period? You Just Know A Man Came Up With That One.

2009-05-29T05:55:00.008-04:00

For those of you who enjoyed last Friday’s blog regarding making tampons and maxi pads more like fortune cookies, longtime friend, college roommate and alert blog reader Flo* has submitted this ideal follow-up. I apologize if you’ve seen it before, but I had to be sure you saw it. It's just precious. It's a love letter written by Wendi Aarons who has her own hilarious blog to Proctor and

Middle Age Has Turned Me Into A Real Mother Plucker

2009-05-28T05:55:00.015-04:00

(Just a warning – you may find the following post, like getting older, disgusting, so put your Ungirdled panties on before reading further.)Like many women, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve developed a newfound love for gardening and landscaping. This love of landscaping, however, does not include the pruning I must now do to my face. These days, I actually have to drag out as many tools to prune my

Easy, Yummy Marinade For Flank Steak! This Week's Ungirdled Recipe!

2009-05-27T05:55:00.014-04:00

This past weekend was the unofficial kick-off for summer and barbecues. So, a super-Ungirdled, yummy marinade for flank steak on the grill you can customize to your Ungirdled taste buds is the perfect Recipe Of The Week!! I've found flank steak to be an easy, affordable way to feed steak to a crowd. (Our local wholesale club and Trader Joe’s have it for $3 less per pound ($5.99) than other

Whoopi Goldberg: Ungirdled Celebrity Of The Week!

2009-05-26T05:59:00.005-04:00

Ungirdled hair, Ungirdled words, Ungirdled heart, Ungirdled talent. There are so many reasons to love Whoopi Goldberg: her many wonderful roles in movies (over 100) and on Broadway, her comedy routines, her charitable work, and her enviable patience with the yet-to-be-Ungirdled Elisabeth Hasselback on The View. Whoopi is one of only ten people who can claim the honor of winning an Emmy, a

Oral Sex Is The New Goodnight Kiss?

2009-05-25T12:45:00.001-04:00

When I was 11, I came home after hanging out in the neighborhood to ask my mother an important question. I had overheard some slightly older girls whispering about French kissing. I was naturally very curious about it, and couldn’t wait to verify the definition with my mother. I was almost sure it must be what you always saw Pepe Le Pew doing to Penelope, the poor,

Have A Happy Period! (Really!)

2009-05-22T05:00:00.011-04:00

A fun, budget-friendly & easy-to-make gift idea for your girlfriends who are still menstruating! Also, a sweet new book for the children in your life!Don’t those commercials for feminine hygiene products with the tagline, “Have A Happy Period,” bug you? AS IF. Periods are never happy – until now!! Here's an idea for making a special gift for your best girlfriend that will actually allow her

It Must Be Good To Be King

2009-05-21T07:00:00.000-04:00

For those of you who don’t know, I am the zookeeper mother of 16 year-old twin orges boys. Most of you Ungirdled women who have/had teenagers will relate. They were THE sweetest children. They actually seemed to like us and even thought we might know a little more than they do. That all started to change just a couple months before their thirteenth birthday, or as we now say, just before

Chipotle Tamale Pie - Ungirdled Recipe Of The Week!

2009-05-20T07:49:00.000-04:00

If you're like me, you are always in search of an easy (UNGIRDLED), tasty, nutritious, and budget-friendly recipe. Well, here’s one! It comes from Ingrid Hoffmann at Food Network (check out their helpful site. (I have made it several times in the last couple of months and my family loves it. Currently, this recipe has a five star rating out of 222 reviews on Food Network's site!) Ingrid hosts

This week’s Ungirdled Celebrity: Amy Sedaris!

2009-05-19T07:04:00.000-04:00

For those of you who don’t know Amy, where do I start? She has co-starred in a number of movies including Elf, Maid in Manhattan, and Shrek). She has appeared in a ton of TV series including Sex And The City, My Name Is Earl, Rescue Me and The Closer. She is a favorite guest on Letterman, Conan, and many other talk shows. She is the little sister of David Sedaris, and she is the author of one

Elizabeth Edwards & Pre-Marriage Negotiations

2009-05-18T07:28:00.000-04:00

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know Elizabeth Edwards is doing a GINORMOUS media tour to promote her new book Resilience that allegedly details her husband’s alleged extramarital affair. (If you have been living under a rock, you better go get yourself proper subsistence before you read the rest of this – I suggest a dozen hot Krispy

Let’s Not Panic – YET.

2009-05-15T07:47:00.000-04:00

(First of "Feedback Fridays" - Krispy Kreme alternatives & one VERY SPECIAL t-shirt!) We Ungirdled Women are nothing if not adaptable, resourceful, innovative improvisers. I believe when faced with possible catastrophe, you should have an emergency plan so you can be prepared for the worst, should it come. So that is just what the Ungirdled Sisterhood shall do. We must

On The Road To Becoming Ungirdled: My Big Fat Prom Mistake(s)

2009-05-14T20:45:00.000-04:00

(I am forgoing the tune of the week in order to provide a public service announcement – a warning, really – to girls about to attend prom.) Prom is coming up at my sons’ high schools, bringing back for me memories good and horrific. Oh, if I had only known then what my Ungirdled self knows now. Sad, but here it is. A photo of me, my date and friends at prom in 1980. It

Ungirdled Recipe Of The Week!

2009-05-13T11:51:00.000-04:00

Krispy Kreme Donut Bread Pudding With Butter Rum Sauce!Recipe courtesy Paula DeenYou probably didn't think a Krispy Kreme donut could get any better. Leave it to Paula Deen to improve upon perfection. Actually, she credits friend Bill Nicholson for this creation. (Bill, you are obviously a genius - a hero really -and very Ungirdled. If I weren't already married, I'd be camping outside your

Ungirdled Celebrity Of The Week:

2009-05-12T08:08:00.000-04:00

Paula Deen is the Ungirdled Celebrity of the week! (You’ll see why she was chosen for this particular week tomorrow.) Most of you know Paula is an accomplished restaurateur, cookbook author and Emmy-winning star of several Food Network shows. She even co-starred in the movie Elizabethtown with Orlando Bloom and Kirsten Dunst! She has recently announced she will have her

OK, Now This Recession Has Gone TOO FAR!

2009-05-11T06:19:00.005-04:00

I was working on another post as my first “real” post, when something alarming and disturbing came to my attention. I knew you’d want to know about it too. Just when I thought this recession couldn’t get any worse, THE WORST has happened. I was strong when some of my favorite gift shops around town closed up, resilient when local real assessments plummeted, and I kept

Welcome To Ungirdled Passion!

2009-05-07T19:13:00.014-04:00

I am so pleased for you to meet my blog! I decided to do this blog, not because I think I am hot shit personally have something special to say. It’s that I think most women around my age have lots of interesting things to say. Women of a certain age have a lot of wisdom to share, and seem more relaxed and ready to have some fun. That